If dying is worse than this.

I cannot remember a time I was ever this ill. I can manage a short day but when it hits it hits hard. I'm sleepy, exhausted, sick feeling, cold shivering, then too hot. Both my kidneys now hurt making the pain in my back unbearable, I'm losing sleep, I feel dizzy, dehydrated, I can't express how bad I feel. 

I'm half way through my antibiotics, I still feel like I'm dying. I never ever want to have this infection again! I can't stand it. If dying is worse than this for gods sake let me go in my sleep at a grand old age.