Monday, 2 November 2015

Walking out

I walked out on my job today. It felt great.
I went on my dinner and something inside snapped like a tight cord and I found myself on autopilot, collecting my bag and putting on my coat and then just walking away. I didn't look back once. I was home in twenty minutes and feeling the most euphoric sense of relief.

This weekend has confirmed to me that I've made the right decision. Any doubts I may have had lingering like a bad smell have gone. I know in my heart this is the best decision, the only decision worth making at this moment in time. I'm not just walking away, they've pushed me most of the distance and now I'm just finishing the journey.

I didn't get paid on Friday. Everyone else on the team did, so what's the excuse for not paying me my months wages? If this isn't another element of victimising an individual I don't know what is. Too coincidental. No apology, no haste to rectify this. I spent the weekend without any money, and then Monday morning I received a disgusting 'telling off' from these assholes for voicing my concerns! They expected me to sit there meekly and do another days work without having been paid for the last 4 weeks! Are you kidding me? and to be spoken to like a child again, like shit wiped from a dirty shoe sole, I'm not having it. Not even an apology you know that, not a single 'sorry'.
Their callus attitude makes me feel worse, they have no conscious, they don't appreciate the detrimental effect of not getting paid on time, because they are part of a corrupt and selfish system.

I had made up my mind before now I thought but now it's settled. I don't want to be around those kinds of people everyday. I don't want to be unhappy every night thinking about the next day. I'm done with not being treated fairly. I'm done with being underappreciated. I am worth more than this. So this was my frame of mind when I snapped.
I've walked out and to hell with it all.
Yes I'm taking a risk, I'm also taking my life in my own hands and out of someone else's.

I'll just do what I always with what I have and take it as it comes.
This is life, it's hard, and I'm taking it one step at a time.

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