I can't seem to relax. I dreamt last night that I was attacked and blinded. Black ink spread across my eyes until I couldn't see anything, and they took my dad away. At this point I couldn't see anything, I just felt my mothers hands on my arms trying to calm me down while I was screaming for someone to find my dad. I woke up at 4am feeling sick and exhausted. I can never settle after a nightmare, and this one was particularly bad. And now I've got several nights of sleeping alone while Jones works late shifts.
The wind is too high up here on this hill, having the window open sounds like the worlds crashing down outside so I shut it again annoyed.
I'm always annoyed lately. I'm so sick of these white walls too-making me feel like I'm going crazy, colourless, lifeless, without personality.
Is it any wonder I can't write anything worthwhile?